"Let me tell you about the Milwaukee Journal's Green Sheet. This insert, literally green, was full of features that fascinated me. At the top was a saying by Phil Osopher that always contained some wonderfully puerile pun. There was also the 'Ask Andy' column: science questions and brief answers. Phil and Andy became friends of mine.
"And then there was an advice column by a woman with the unlikely name of Ione Quinby Griggs, who gave no-nonsense Midwestern counsel. My affair with the solid Milwaukee Journal deepened (local news, business pages, favorite columnists). . . . Gradually my attitude toward newspapers matured . . . My devotion devolved into a simple adult appreciation of good newspaper reporting and writing. My former fetishism is still apparent, however, in the number of papers I read and in an excessive affection for their look, feel, smell, and peculiarities."
(We who also regularly read the "literally green" section know that the sayings were penned by Phil Osofer. Well, Paulos is a math prof, not a proofreader -- but he is a good writer and good judge of good puns . . . or the other sort of puns at the top of page one of the "Green Sheet.")
Do you remember "Dear Mrs. Griggs"? Share your stories, as her readers did. . . .